tigerbeatpoet, xo

what i listen to on the way there and in between

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Bruce Springsteen ...

Christ, isn't that widget one of the ugliest things you have ever seen?

Well, bear with me. I had a moment with this song last night, as a group of me and what have so recently become some of my closest friends briefly drifted to sleep at the same time. But that was disrupted by my uncontrolled laughter at the unprecedented preciousness.

I'm not a stranger to Bruce Springsteen, but I could puke non-stop for at least thirty minutes over what beauty I have missed, raising myself on radio all these years. So, last night, Darkness on the Edge of Town almost killed me.

I'm going through a wonderful and awful, confusing yet eye-opening time of self-realization and exploration. I'm twenty-eight years old. Am I cut out to be an adventurer? I'm still not sure what I want out of my experience. My life is very much my own - as I share it with some amazing people, and a person or two who I need to say some amicable goodbyes to. For the most part, I am inexplicably happy. And then there are the darker moments, but I manage to keep that at bay with the perfect song and a cup of hot cocoa, which usually puts me right.

I can't decide if I want to run out into the street screaming or if I want to dance around my living room joyously in my underwear with all the shades up. Out of all the emotions that truly hold us back from living life to the fullest (or whatever cliches are out there) - For the most part, I am NOT a cynic. I have the heart of an optimist (in a jar of formaldehyde on my bookshelf), but I am prone to my moments of rampant complaining and ranting. I love and despise some things will all of my being. And somedays the things I love become the things I hate and vice versa. That's just who I am. I am a dealer of extremes. Highs and lows, for all my many moods.

But Christ - it's gonna be a hell of a week that will THRILL and exhaust me. Seriously, as I sit here listening to Born to Run I am having a moment. What is it that makes me fight back tears while listening to Thunder Road? Is it the absolute excitement of even the IDEA that I will be seeing The Boss of Alexa Jones on Friday? I am a sap. You got a problem with that? Well, I say with a smirk - go fuck yourself :)

I guarantee, that on Thursday around 9pm, I will be out of breath, thrashing my hair about and screaming my brains out to MOTHERFUCKING ART BRUT! Oh yeah, The Hold Steady is pretty sweet too...

And of course, a Halloween dance party at the Varsity on Wednesday?? Dance Band, MC/VL? Zombie-a-thon?? How much fake blood can I manage to cover myself in? Only time will tell. Shit, I need to go to sleep or I will be dead by Saturday...


At 11:15 PM, Blogger Alexa said...


Born to Run is the greatest album of all time.

Thank you endlessly for getting me!

At 9:09 AM, Blogger Juan Appagado said...

"I have the heart of an optimist (in a jar of formaldehyde on my bookshelf)"



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